Sorry it took me so long to post this week. I haven’t really had much to report. The training for my job has been fun and interesting, but it’s not exactly something I would want to write about on here. Well, I did get to teach the class for about five minutes, and although I was anxious about it, I think I did alright. I’ve mostly switched back to vaping rather than smoking, and that’s been pretty fun because a lot of my fellow trainees vape.
As far as things at home go, I haven’t had any more incidents with my hair brush or other inanimate objects. So that’s good. The meds must be working. I’m now on my full dose of each of them, 100 mg of Lamictal, and 200 mg of Seroquel. I’m sleeping a lot. Oh, but I have had an interesting thing happen. I’ve been dreaming again.
Let me clarify what I mean by again. Up until this week it had been more than two years since I last remember dreaming. I’m sure I was having dreams, but never ones that I could remember. This week so far I have had three, two of which I can’t recall right now, but the third was a dream where my teeth were all falling out. I’ve heard that this is a fairly common dream, so I got curious and looked up what that means according to dream theory. Apparently it means that I am afraid of growing older, or at least that I am afraid of becoming less proficient at something or other.
This made sense to me on several levels, the first of which was my birthday. I’ve never been coy about my age, every year that goes by and finds me still alive is a year to be proud of. Still, I do worry that I am getting to old to do all the things I want to with my life. On the other hand I have a test coming up at work, and I am having some anxiety about that. Then again it might be because I decided to participate in ink-tober with one of my younger siblings, and I’m feeling pretty inferior in my drawing abilities. Admittedly, ink has never been my medium, but still, I find myself criticizing and over analyzing each picture over and over. Maybe it’s even a combination of all three, but what ever the reason it was a pretty weird dream.
So that’s been my life lately. Next week I’ll actually start taking some phone calls at work, so I will probably have more to say then. In the meantime I hope you all enjoy the rest of your week, and thanks for reading!