So I’ve had a few people tell me now that they are sorry about my suffering. Thank you for reaching out and telling me that, and for sharing your own trials with me, but I feel that I need to clear something up. I am not suffering. At least not the way that I think of suffering. I am not posting about my experiences to gain sympathy or condolences. My goal is to heighten awareness, and give people a different perspective to use in studying my disorders, and in writing characters that have the disorders.
I know I can write some pretty sad stuff, sometimes, and sometimes I get discouraged, but I can also be happy and hopeful too. I’m just like everyone else. I can even draw som parallels between my disorders and other disabilities. If I was blind, I would have a seeing eye dog to keep me from going into dangerous situations. My therapy dog keeps me out of dangerous places too, the only difference is that the dangerous places I need to be wary of are in my mind. A blind person cannot drive because they are a danger to themselves and others, and so am I so I don’t drive either.
I don’t mean to make light of blindness, but I just want to help you to see that I am ok. Do blind people wonder what it would be like to see? I’m sure some of them do sometimes, but it doesn’t necessarily mean they suffer any more or less than anyone else. I wonder sometimes how my life would be different if I didn’t have bipolar disorder, or OCD, or social anxiety, but I am what I am. I don’t know any other way to be. I deal, I cope, and, more often than you might think, I am happy just the way I am.
There may be some things that I am missing out on, but I basically get to get high legally, and without drugs for a whole week every month or so, so maybe there are some things that I get to experience that other people are missing out on. Not that I advocate using drugs, I don’t. It’s way to easy to mess up you brain and your brain is very important for breathing and stuff.
Basically, what I am trying to say here is that you shouldn’t feel sorry for me, and try not to worry. I will be fine.